His Hope Uganda

Hello. It’s snowing. Not in Uganda, sadly, but here in Calgary where I am enjoying the view from my sister’s couch. I don’t think I ever really appreciated snow until I moved to Uganda even though I thought I did. I also don’t think I ever really appreciated the sun until I left Uganda and came to Canada in the middle of the winter.  Thankfully it’s a mild winter.

I’ve been back in Canada for almost three weeks now. People always ask me how it feels to be back in Canada and I tell them that I wish it felt strange but it doesn’t at all. I haven’t felt any culture shock coming back to Canada in a long time, probably because not only do I know what I’m coming back to, I actually look forward to it now. I don’t battle with guilt like I used to because I’ve come to realize that I do need a break and it’s not a crime to enjoy hot showers or good food while I’m here. I don’t have access to those things much anymore and I think it would be a crime NOT to enjoy them. And I certainly appreciate them.

However, it is a struggle in some ways. It’s so easy to get caught up in myself here and things that really don’t matter (like the fact that George Clooney has a serious girlfriend who isn’t me) and it’s a trap that I fall into every time I’m here. It’s easy to get too comfortable. It’s easy to lose focus. It’s easy to get distracted. And it’s scarily easy how quickly I can put God on the back burner. That’s my biggest struggle and my biggest frustration.

But let’s move out of Canada and back into Uganda. The beginning of the year was blessed but also very very busy. I don’t think I’ve ever been so busy in my life. We accepted 43 new students into our Child Sponsorship Program, two more then I originally planned which is a miracle considering it could have easily been twenty. We are also supporting a young man who is in his second and final year of a plumbing course. In total, that makes 91 students.

That may not sound like a lot but it sure felt like a lot three weeks before school started. 91 students meant buying 91 pairs of shoes at the market in town (every student had to come with us to try the shoes on), 131 pairs of socks, 91 tins of shoe polish, over 130 brooms, 240 rolls of toilet paper, and well over $1000 of school supplies. It meant a day of sorting through all those things and dividing them up according to the individual needs of each student.Almost every student, depending on which school they attended and which class they were in, got a different number of pens, pencils, books, brooms, and so on.

It also meant bringing 34 students for interviews, getting uniforms and sweaters for 43 students and passport photos for twelve, as well as paying school fees at eleven different schools and spending hours in line ups to pay fees at four different banks.

It was a busy month (I didn’t even mention the time consuming hassle of picking up dog poop every day). But very worth it because by the time I left, every student was in school with everything he or she needed. Praise God as He deserves all the glory for that.

Before I continue, I want to address one quick thing. Many of you have supported HHU by joining the page on Facebook that my sister set up a couple of months ago. I owe her a huge ‘thanks’ for setting it up and I think it’s a great way to spread the word about what’s happening in Uganda. However, I do sign on through her Facebook every once in a while to see what’s happening and I was shocked to discover something that my parents had posted at the end of January. As most of you now know, I had an issue with a “pimple” (as my mom put it) on my face. The issue was that I tried to kind of pop it (unsuccessfully) and ended up with a nasty infection that caused me swelling and unthinkable pain for quite a few days. I ended up on some pretty strong antibiotics and thanks to those and your prayers it eventually healed but it was a really scary couple of days.

I would like to defend myself by saying that I still don’t believe it was a pimple (even though three doctors and every person in Uganda that I know has told me that it was). I am convinced that it was some kind of insect bite that was going to cause swelling and pain anyway and that I am only guilty of speeding up the process. Auntie Christine did say at one point that she thought it might be a maggot and I actually prayed for days that one would come crawling out of my face, just for the sake of my pride. Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case because that would have been such a cooler story (not to mention much less shameful).

Back to things that matter.

I hope you have come to realize how much I love Uganda and how much I love Ugandans. I would not be living in Uganda if I didn’t. But sometimes life in a different culture gets tough and I get tired of people’s judgments and expectations. I can completely understand why people act the way they do and in some ways it’s justifiable considering the number of hardships that people have to face. I’m sure that if I were Ugandan, I would have the same attitude towards Mzungus as they do. The toughest situations to deal with though are not the ones where people expect something or even ask for something, they’re the ones where people take something. Schools are a good example.

Private schools in Uganda are more of a business than anything else. There are a lot of teachers and headmasters who are corrupt and looking for any way to make money for themselves. We now work in seven different Primary schools. In the past year, at least six (that we know of) have at one point or another ripped us off. Whether it’s been as minor as refusing to give us our $1.15 in change or as major as stealing $200 through lies and false costs, they have almost all done it.

I can’t tell you how frustrating it is to not be able to trust the schools that we’re working with, especially knowing that trust is the reason we got into those situations to begin with. I have been told several times (mostly by Ugandans) not to trust people in Uganda and it has always bothered me that people are so reluctant to trust others. However, it was my willingness to trust people that gave them the perfect opportunity to take what they could from me. I have to admit that I made it easy to do at first. I let too many moments pass when I should have said something but I didn’t. But I’ve also taken a stand several times only to come out on the losing end, making me more frustrated and bitter.

The hardest thing for me to deal with in Uganda is the fact that I will never be a Ugandan. I can learn the language fluently, wear as many skirts and gomesi’s (Ugandan dresses with wings as my dad likes to call them) as I possibly can, and eat posho three times a day but it won’t change one simple fact – I am white. I could learn the names of every person in my village and be an auntie to all of their children but I would still be different. As much as I long to and as hard as I try, I will never quite fit in.

I will always be white.

Sometimes it really doesn’t bother me. But sometimes it drives me crazy.

I find one thing ironic in all of this. For 24 years it seemed like all I wanted was for someone to notice me. I wanted to stand out and be different. I thought that my life would be so much better if only I could catch someone’s eye.

Now, for the past three years, all I’ve wanted to do is blend it and not be noticed. I want to be equal and invisible and I think my life would be so much easier if only I wasn’t so different.

Isn’t it great how God teaches us things?

I think what I’m learning is that I shouldn’t be so worried about whether or not I stand out or fit in or what colour I am because God made me exactly as I am for a reason. And I shouldn’t care what people think of me because His love for me will never change. It shouldn’t matter where I go because He will always be with me. And I should stop thinking about where I fit in because I am His.

Yes, I could easily come up with a lot of reasons why I hate being a North American in Uganda and I can grumble on and on about the hundreds of times that I’ve been taken advantage of. But being white has also brought me a lot of blessings. And when I really think about how God is able to use me, a lone Muzungu in a different culture, I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Many of you have asked about Auntie Christine, thank you.

As you probably know, Christine was being spiritually and sometimes even physically attacked by Satan, who over the past year was coming to her at night and telling her that he was going to take her life. He tried to convince her that she would not live past the age of 26. Although her faith never wavered, she was really struggling to find the strength to endure Satan’s opposition. I requested prayer for her in an email a few months back and I wanted to update you on her situation.

She turned 27 on January 22^nd. That night she felt a cold gust of wind enter her room and she knew that she would hear the voice again. Instead of threatening her however, he said that he knew that a lot of people were praying for her and that her God is a working God. Because of that, he told her she had won and that he would not take her life.

It was amazing to hear and it is such an incredible example of God’s power and protection. We are so thankful for your prayers.

However, after that victory came more struggles. Christine recently found out that her aunt has placed some kind of curse on her. Witchcraft in Uganda in very real and apparently her aunt has done this before to two other family members, who have both since passed away. Christine said that her aunt has sent demons after her and that she has been physically attacked a couple of times in the past month. The good news is that when she gets attacked, the demons flee when Christine shouts the name of Jesus.

Christine has clearly been chosen by God to do amazing things for Him and Satan knows that she’s a threat. I know that she will make it through this but I can’t imagine how difficult and scary it must be for her. Please continue to pray for her safety and protection as well as physical, emotional, and spiritual strength. And pray that these attacks will stop once and for all. Thank you.

God has provided for us in ways that I can’t even believe if I think about it too much. From favour in the government to our staff to the kids we work with to finances, everything has been so blessed. Please continue to pray for us as we move ahead, especially because we need wisdom to know when and how to expand our work. Please pray that He keeps us humble and that we would always find ways to give him the glory in everything we do.

As for me, I need motivation and inspiration as well as divine intervention as I try to raise support from businesses over the next couple of weeks before I head back to Uganda.

Thank you for your invaluable prayers and support.

If you know anyone who would be interested in sponsoring a child through His Hope Uganda please contact me or my parents. We are still looking for sponsors for about 18 beautiful Ugandan kids and trusting that God already knows who they are.

I was able to go snowboarding a few days ago and it was a perfect day. I will never get over how beautiful the mountains are here. It is such an indescribably amazing feeling to be sitting on the top of a mountain, in the middle of a spectacular range of mountains. But it’s an even more amazing feeling by far to know that not only am I loved by the one who made those incredible mountains, I actually have the honour of knowing Him personally.

Have a wonderful week and thanks for reading. Much love, Kimi